hello~ it's me

haven't written anything in a long time (actually, that's a lie, i've written a few drafts here and there but haven't finished anything in a long time).

a lot has changed, i guess.

im out of school.
i work full-time.
changing circles of friends.

[that wasn't parallelism and it's bothering me lol]

whenever people ask me how i'm doing these days, i reeally have to think to give them a not fluffy "fine thanks!" answer. honestly, working makes time fly and weeks are really starting to feel like minutes. after a week of work, i legit can't even remember what i ate for dinner the day before. it's nice though, i don't hate what i do and i'm always reminded that i need to be thankful to even have a job. like, after some shitty days of work, as i walk to my car feeling like doodoo, i suddenly think, dude, my job is pretty awesome. i'm so glad i don't work in a stuffy business-y cubicle job with a bunch of old snooty coworkers. and i loooove work so much compared to school. like i could never go back to school.

another thing that's changed, even just in the last few months, is my circle of friends. now that i work, i rarely see anyone aside from my coworkers and church friends. and my church friends are really the girls on the football team. it's pretty nutty how quickly i got close to some of those girls. i think people can look at my "group of friends" from church and cast a lot of judgement, esp in a church setting, but i'm always thankful for a group of friends that vary in age and career and lifestyle. always a learning experience. and we have fun.


another thing i've been noticing during this period of just quick living is that i don't really know where i'm at like mentally emotionally spiritually. i sometimes feel like i just get up and live and then go to sleep, and repeat.  i hardly have time to think. i miss having lazy days just reading books and thinking of random things and rolling around. my thinking time has been limited to my commute to work. i guess this is my fear with the reality that work= the rest of my life. i'm scared i'm just gna become a boring robot. hoping that because i'm self-aware of this already, i can prevent it by actively taking time to just relax once in a while.

i sometimes think of random things i want to blog about. like how old men with lunchboxes make me sad or how im realizing that eyebrows are so crucial. but i will save them for another day maybe.

song of the moment--
kids - childish gambino