i suspect 2013 is going to be big

i was explaining this to a friend on new year's eve but the concept of celebrating new years is beyond me. i dont mean to sound cynical but what is the difference between december 31, 2012 and january 1, 2013 besides the date/ the numbers on the calendar? i mean, i understand that the passing of "a year" is momentous but isn't that why we individually celebrate our birthdays? (i think korea calculates your age by each new year, rather than your birthday, so i suppose it could be a bigger deal there) but seriously! birthdays mark a year of life, birthdays mean you've made it through another year, birthdays celebrate the coming year. even a new school year has more meaning than the actual new year. a new school year= advancing a grade, new classes, a feeling of increased responsibility. january 1st? it's just another day. a new calendar year. maybe that's why it's usually so anticlimactic..

sidenote: especially for resolutions.. those are personal resolutions, MAKE THEM ON YO BIRTHDAY!

what more is january 1st than a milestone in an institutionalized concept of time? i mean, we don't even know if it marks the anniversary of the beginning of existence. maybe i'm too stupid to know how months/ days/ years were calculated and decided but i find it a little ridiculous that we are so quick to accept the fact that we have 31 days every other month of the year and that besides february, which only has 28 days (& 29 days.. every four years..), the rest have 30 days. like whuuut? why so specific? it's kind of crazy to think that we could be extremely incorrect and that this whole global warming isn't a scientific mystery but rather time catching up with us (i know it's not true, just a hypothetical situation). maybe some of you geology (?), biology (?), science-y people are shaking your head and chuckling at my sad pitiable ignorance, but please, if you have answers, educate me!

okay wow, that rant was pretty irrelevant and longer than i expected..

what i really wanted to write about was 2013. as much as i dont believe in the concept of making a new year a big deal, i really feel like this next span of 12 months is going to be quite different for me personally. not sure why. i know i have a habit of constantly reflected on how much/ how little i and my circumstances have changed but i think this one is going to be like.. kick-in-the-face different. besides a certain something that i am dreading and know for a fact might possibly bring about verrry drastic changes, i foresee a lot of crazy possibilities in multiple aspects of life. also, dang, this next fall i'm going to be a freaking senior. WHAT THE HECK. they weren't kidding when they say every year of your life feels faster and faster.
& with these changes, i think there are going to be moments where i will need to make some crazy decisions. (God, help me!) as nerve-wracking as it is (i hate making choices, i am way to indecisive) i somehow feel pretty okay about it. looking to Jesus this new year to help me make it through.

side(relevant)story: in light of said dreaded "thing", i've been feeling awfully anxious and on edge lately-- even to the point of contemplating some heavy topics. i was (of course) being overly dramatic and woebegone in my mind. but somehow, in the midst of all that, i was able to gain a better perspective of how utterly stupid i was being. there is no doubt that this "thing" will most likely result in some tough times but have i really not learned that all it takes is some weathering to get to the other side? and no matter the result, have i not learned that my faith is in God? silly me.

so YES, 2013. whatever you bring, good/ bad, tough/easy, i have a BIG feeling about you!!

--
i shall leave you all with a few C.S Lewis quotes that seem to appropriately capture a few of the sentiments i have illustrated above. (in other words, here comes the C.S Lewis nutshell)

"Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when we look back everything's different?"
"There are far better things ahead than anything we leave behind"

oh, how i wish i had C.S Lewis' mind.. or at least his friendship.