recent craziness.

*disclaimer: this is going to be an unbelievably long post. if you are supposed to be studying for midterms (yes, i see you), i advise you to revisit this post later*

1) last wednesday, after work, i made a quick run to the fashion district to buy ribbons so that the girls playing powderpuff could make ribbons at our dinner tomorrow. i got all the materials and headed back to school to get dinner and talk about STSM with kellyna, a freshman that was applying. traffic was a bit heavy but i was in a good mood, excited to talk to kellyna and glad i found all the materials i needed. as i drove through the unfamiliar neighborhood and prepared to turn right onto washington, the huge black SUV that was driving to my left decided it also wanted to turn right. without even glancing to his right, he suddenly sprang into my lane and though i honked and veered right (into the curb), his car slammed my car and after scraping the side, he paused and then drove off quickly. in the immediate aftermath of the accident, as i sat in my car, staring at the back of his fleeing car, i thought "surely he'll stop..." but as i realized he wasn't planning on stopping at all, two thoughts went through my mind: a) i should memorize his license plate number b) i should take a picture. as i flailed to do both and either, i was only able to type his license plate number into my phone. after THAT, i just sat there.. my car stopped in the middle of a lane with its emergency lights on and wondered what to do. thankfully there was only damage to the fender of my car and none to me or any crucial parts but i realized i had absolutely no idea what to do. was i allowed to move from the scene? did i have to take pictures? after some quick research on my phone, i decided to call the police. but wait, how did i call the police?!? the incident seemed a little minor to deem "emergency-worthy" and call 911 but i did it anyway. after multiple transfers, i talked to an officer who asked me a series of questions and then advised that i should drive over to the nearest LAPD station. so i did, braking hard at the slightest movement in my peripheral and made it to the ghetto-est station i had ever seen. after parking my car, some rationality returned and i realized i would probably need to show them my driver's license. my expired drivers license. my 5months expired drivers license. sighhh. i imagined myself getting locked behind bars for driving without a valid license (dramatic, i know). after consulting my parents, i decided to go anyway and report the incident. luckily the officer that helped me was a real pal and didn't say a single thing about my expired license and helped me fill out the report w no hassle at all!

2) the DAY after, i woke up early in hopes of getting some time before my classes to take pictures around LA for my photography class. i managed to drag myself out of bed and into the shower around 7 in the morning (impressive, i know) and noticed that i felt oddly hungry. like EXTREMELY hungry. hungry to the point where i considered tweeting about this anomaly (i decided against it because i realized that it's really nobody's business.. nor care). i was pretty much done with my shower when i realized that i was actually NOT hungry but extremely nauseous. as my stomach started abusing me my first thought was, "must throw up in toilet, not shower" (lol..) as i tried to process that command and move at the same time, the world started spinning and then... i woke up later.. facedown in the bath tub.  i remember thinking when i opened my eyes, "is it raining..." HAHAH (i can only laugh at this in retrospect). i had passed out. what an interesting experience. praise the LORD that i didnt hit my face and cut my tongue off or break something.. the only proof i have that this really happened is a little crescent shaped cut on my knee from a bottlecap-turned-stamp, a cut on my lip from my own teeth, a cracking jaw, and some bruises on my knees. i dont think i was out that long but i had made a mess in the bathroom, knocking over every bottle in the shower. i picked up all but a few until realized i wasnt feeling too great so i left the rest, dressed, and crawled to my room. i realized that if i could just hold my stomach together it hurt less, so i did, called my mom and then fell asleep. as im looking back at it right now, i cant help but wonder how weird it must have been for esther. to see me curled up in my bed right after i had showered and find the bathroom in shambles LOL. or how weird it wouldve been if she had been awake when it happened. she's been really into law& order svu these days... HAHA. well anyway, she woke me up to see if i was okay and i ran to the bathroom and after unsuccessfully sitting w my head on the toilet, i eventually threw up dinner from the night before and went in and out of sleep. finally, my parents showed up with some medicine and took me to the health center on our campus (sidenote: our health center is BALLIN' holy moly..) by then, after throwing up repeatedly, i was starting to feel a little better so i managed to get through the checkup and 5 different heartrate monitor test things (i seriously thought my arm was going to explode from all the pressure LOL). i discovered that i have an unnaturally low resting heart rate. alarmed by my measly 40 bpm heartrate, my nurse even asked if i was a professional athlete (LOLOL). the doctors told me its nothing to worry about and that it could just be a post-fainting state. she then diagnosed me (kinda) with some kind of stomach virus and let me go. i basically slept the rest of the day and ate pepto bismol like it was candy. i eventually started feeling relatively normal again with just minor nauseousness and by friday/ saturday i was ready to prep, practice, and play for powderpuff (lol.. PTL i was healthy enough to play..)

3) TODAY, after a relatively nice day spent, i had to deal with one particularly annoying person that i (unfortunately) think i just might hate. and whilst trying to be patient and loving and kind, i decided to stop by the bank that is literally around the corner from my apartment. i decided to drive because the walk is.. not the safest. i actually sat in front of the bank in my locked car for a little bit to wait while a group of drunk men (coming from a kings game?) noisily stumbled past my car. when the coast was presumably clear, i ran into the bank, got to the atm, settled my stuff and got back in my car. safe. i dawdled a little bit because i was texting with eileen about what had happened earlier with said hated person. when i'd finished texting with eileen, i set off back towards my apartment (approximately a 30 second drive). as i approached the first light to turn left, i noticed a motorcycle coming the other way, about to turn the opposite way down the same street as me. i figured it was probably a cop so put my phone down and slowly turned and moved along. of course right when i was RIGHT next to my apartment, i see the blue and red lights and hear the dreaded siren. i hastily put my seatbelt on and threw my phone in my bag as i pulled over (lol..) and sat there wondering what i was getting caught for. and then it hit me (again), my license. omg, my expired license. the cop was.. talking on the phone.. and took his sweeeet time getting to me -_- and when he finally did, he told me i was getting pulled over for a dead headlight... seriously. instead of letting me a go with a warning when i told him it had literally happened earlier that day and that i was waiting for my dad to help me with it later today, he handed me a fix-it ticket, which not only required me to fix it as soon as possible but get it freaking INSPECTED at a police station (im pretty sure i have to pay a stupid fine too..) i kept trying to explain my situation to the cop and that i was literally 10 seconds away from my apartment and i had only gone out to go to the bank but he rudely cut me off and condescendingly told me "i dont understand a word you're saying. i dont care when you fix it, just fix it and get it inspected, okay??" by then i was fuming. i considered the repercussions of calling him a bad word and (thankfully) decided against it. when he finally let me go i felt like strangling someone.. 17 seconds later i was parked in my structure and about 3 seconds away from crying out of sheer frustration.

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pretty crazy, no? (i actually started typing more furiously as i wrote #3-- too fresh, methinks loll). but i guess after i calmed down a bit, i came to the conclusion that all the things that i feel angry, upset, or frustrated about cloud me from remembering the "PTL-moments". they werent kidding when they say "clouded judgement". in the heat of the moment i could only think of all the things i hated. but in retrospect, i cant help but always say "at least.." or "thank God i didn't.." so here's another list (yep, told you it'd be long) of what im glad happened in the above 3 crazy moments:

1) i am glad the accident was extremely minor and that i didnt get hurt. im glad that my car wasn't totaled and is still in working condition! im glad that the cop didn't notice or say anything about my expired license.

2) i am glad that i am still healthy. that even if i had "a scare" it's nothing compared to people who are actually ill and hurting like that every day. im glad that i got a glimpse of what it's like-- a way to sympathize. im glad i didnt hurt myself while passing out.

3) i am glad that the cop didn't notice i was on my phone and not wearing my seatbelt when he pulled me over (that would have been expensive). i am glad the cop (again) didnt say a word about my extremely expired license. i am glad i decided not to cuss out the cop (lol).


moral: hatred/ bitterness is toxic. dont let craziness get you down!